Psychology Behind relationship management

Psychology behind relationship management

          How do we get the people we want in our lives to like us for who we are? This require great relationship management skills. Poor relationship management skills will have you making two horrible wishes. You will either wish for people who aren’t in your life and that don’t want to be in your life to be in your life. Or you will wish for the people who are in your life to want to be in your life, even though they don’t want to be in your life.

          The truth of relationships is simple. Some people want to be in our lives and some people don’t want to be in our lives. We just have to make sure that we want the people who want to be in our lives and not waste time on the people who don’t want to be in our lives.

          Most people have a tendency of trying to get everyone to like them. For example, marketers try to get every type of customer to like them while completely ignoring their target market. Specific customers like specific companies. Similar to relationships with people, some people will not like you for you and that is okay.

          How do we find the people that want to be in our lives? The answer to this question is quite simple. We have to put ourselves in certain environments in which we can attract those kind of people. If we make it easy for people to find us, we will be found by the right people.

          In addition to becoming more visible, we will also be found by the wrong people. This is okay as well. The wrong people are typically the people that want to be in our lives but we don’t want them in our lives. These are the type of people we have to reject and let down. For every wrong person we let down, we are one more person closer to finding the right person or people.

          Social bulking is an optimal strategy to take when attempting to create the perfect relationship balance for your life. Social bulking is accumulating as many acquaintances as possible and decide how many will stay acquaintances and how many will become friends. It is always better to meet tons of people and get rid of the wrong people than it is to overanalyze people one by one. Coming from the place of abundance allows you to not get invested in the outcome of your analysis. If all you have is one acquaintance, you are more likely to put all your eggs in one basket and hope that one acquaintance will eventually reach friend status. However, having multiple acquaintances allows you to diversify your relationships and becoming committed to a few.

          The commitment process of eliminating wrong people and keeping the right people is called social cutting. Social cutting follows social bulking and is a process in which you are choosing to put your faith into a few individuals after much deliberation. After this process, you should have the people who you want to have in your life and those people should also want to be in your life. This is how your relationships should be because neither party will feel like they are wasting time with the wrong person.

          Why do most people have poor relationships? Most people have poor relationships for two reasons and two reasons only. One of the reasons why people have poor relationships is due to exposure. People don’t put themselves in enough public environments. Thus, they don’t give themselves the opportunity to have great relationships. People can fix this problem by joining clubs, organizations, or being a part of groups. The other reason why people have poor relationships is due to lying. People are not being honest enough in their environments to attract the people who could potentially like them for them. If you don’t show people who you really are, how can they ever like you for it? People have a tendency to avoid vulnerability because it’s not safe from criticism. If you worry too much about being criticized, you won’t find the people who can praise you for what you are being criticized for. We all must take risks and let people see us for who we really are if we want meaningful authentic relationships.

          In conclusion, as long as you put yourself in social environments and don’t come off as a “fake person” because your nonverbal communication is in alignment with your verbal communication, you will attract quality relationships in no time. This is basically a 3 step process. Step1: Quality attracts quality. You have to work on yourself and become a valuable individual. Step2: You have to accumulate people in your life through social bulking and not only keep the right people through social cutting, but also keep the quality people. Step3: Of all the quality people you have in your life, you have to find the small percentage that wants to be in your life given that you also want to have them in your life.

         

          There is a lot of screening for specifics involved and to think that you can have amazing relationships with only a handful of acquaintances is absurd.