Psychology behind Networking with people

Psychology behind Networking with people

          Networking is the process of turning acquaintances into friends. Most people misconstrue the real meaning of networking and think it is simply turning strangers into acquaintances. This is far from true. Real networking, or just simply “networking”, is going from acquaintanceship to friendship.

          To simply meet a stranger and initiate conversation is turning a stranger into an acquaintance. This is NOT networking. Networking is a skill that must be developed and constantly maintained. Talking to strangers is too easy of a task to consider it a skill. People who are great at networking have put in countless hours developing the skill of networking to become great at it.

          How can you develop the skill of networking? This is a two-step process. For most people, the process is too long but for people with elite networking skills, the process isn’t long enough.

The first step of the process is to become self-fulfilled. Most people view the act of networking as an opportunity to take value from others rather than sharing and spreading their own value. Acquaintances can see and sense when we are being a value-seeking parasite. No one likes a parasite; therefore, they get rejected.

         

To become self-fulfilled, you have to be in complete control of your own emotions. You have to understand that if you want to feel better, you have to become better. People who understand that their own actions affect their own emotions will typically pursue actions that make themselves feel better. Once you’ve established emotional control, you don’t need others as much as a value-seeking parasite. And at this point, you are able to provide value to others.

The second step of the process is putting yourself in lots of social environments. These social environments allow you to turn strangers into acquaintances so that you can one day turn acquaintances into friends. Too many people get in social environments and fail to follow up on acquaintances and continue the relationship. This is commonly due to a fear of being rejected. This fear of being rejected by someone who vaguely knows you is a threshold you must overcome in order to develop the skill of networking.

After pushing through that threshold, the real challenge begins. At this point, you must be vulnerable and willing to get rejected for your authenticity. Too many people try to conform to an imaginative belief of how they think their acquaintance want them to be and not simply be their natural self. As a result of being incongruent (nonverbal communication out of alignment with verbal communication), you will never turn an acquaintance into a friend. And if by some miracle you do, it will be impossible to maintain the relationship because it’s built off a foundation of lies.

In conclusion, to become good at networking, you have to be honest and vulnerable. Within your honesty and vulnerability must be quality value in which others can benefit from. Without those two things, networking effectively is unlikely and becoming good at it is impossible.